So I read this book in 2020 or 2021 and I believe it was written roughly around that time. The author is a woman with a unique name (which for the love of cheese, I cannot recall) and her bio said she lives on an island off the coast of England (could be Channel Islands) or possibly coast of Australia! Oh man, I’ve really forgotten!
The story is written first person from the perspective of a girl as she grows up, and then also as she is an adult. I forget how her father died, but I think he was on a boat at sea and never returned. The girl is sent to live in a house on the coast with a woman guardian, who is not her mom or stepmom, and their relationship is curt. There is a creepy male family friend who drives up every other week or so to check in on them and I think gives them money.
At some point, a German pilot crashes his plane into the ocean, swims to shore, and comes to their house. They help him and hide him in their attic. As I recall, he speaks little English. The little girl develops a loving sweet relationship with him, and he teaches her to draw. The girl’s guardian woman falls for him, and the little girl feels jealous of their relationship. At some point later in the book, the creepy man is coming over and the girl is upset with her guardian, and intentionally leaves the door to the attic open where the creepy man will hear them talking. The creepy man discovers them and basically tells the man to walk into the ocean, knowing he will not survive the freezing water.
In the meantime, in the present, the now adult little girl is planning the day she will die and leaving a note for her neighbor letting him know. She is visited by a teen girl who is sitting on her fence (and I think she is the daughter of the creepy man and her guardian). I know it’s complicated!
The grown little girl does end her life as she planned, but it’s not graphic or violent.
I cannot remember any names, but I think the time is WW2 because of the German pilot.
Thank you so much for any ideas! I’ve searched so many searches and authors and come up empty.
Stump the Bookseller
New format, same book stumper solving.
Hi! A friend found this passage by searching my note above on google – but still no author/title. Thank you for any ideas!
‘The salt-laced air of the coast was the first thing I remember, the relentless rhythm of the waves against the shore a constant in my life, even before I understood what it meant to lose someone at sea. My father, they said, was swallowed by the ocean, his fishing boat never to be seen again. I was too young to grasp the finality of it, only the sudden absence that left a hollow in our home, a space that was eventually filled by Aunt Clara, a woman with a stern face and a voice that echoed the unending roar of the sea.
Our house, perched precariously on the cliff edge, was a solitary sentinel against the vast expanse of water, where the only other visitors were Mr. Finch, a man whose smile never quite reached his eyes, and whose visits every other week were as unwelcome as the chill that crept into the air when he stepped inside. He always seemed to be watching, his gaze lingering on me in a way that made my skin crawl.
Then came the day the sky turned a violent shade of grey and the ocean churned with an unnatural fury. A plane, a German one, according to the whispers that later filled the town, crashed into the water, and a man, soaked and shivering, appeared on our doorstep. We took him in, hiding him away in the attic, a secret we kept tightly guarded. He spoke little English, but his eyes held a quiet sadness that mirrored my own.
I called him Herr Schmidt, and he became my refuge in a world that felt increasingly cold. He taught me to draw, the soft lines of his pencil dancing across the paper, creating worlds far more beautiful than the bleak reality outside. Aunt Clara, too, was drawn to him, her harsh edges softening in his presence, a change that sparked an unfamiliar jealousy within me.
But the peace was shattered when Mr. Finch discovered our secret. His face twisted into a mask of malice as he confronted Herr Schmidt, the words he spoke laced with a cruel threat. He forced Herr Schmidt to walk into the ocean, the icy water claiming him as the waves relentlessly crashed against the shore.
Years later, as I stood on the precipice of my own ending, the memory of that day remained vivid. I had left a note for my neighbor, a simple explanation for my departure, a final act of defiance against the life that had become so unbearably bleak. As I watched the sun sink into the horizon, a figure appeared on the distant cliff, a young girl, her features uncannily familiar, her eyes mirroring the same ocean that had taken my father and the man who had brought a flicker of light into my life. I knew then, with a chilling certainty, that the legacy of cruelty would continue to ripple through the generations, just as the waves would forever crash against the unforgiving coast.
The sea, once a symbol of loss, became my final embrace, the cold water washing away the pain of a life lived under the shadow of a dark secret, a secret that had finally been revealed in the chilling gaze of a girl who looked so much like me, yet was so far removed from the lonely child who had once stood on the edge of this very cliff, watching the ocean claim another life.’